I don't have anything profound or revelatory to share, and I won't go into some metaphor to secretly disguise my thoughts towards certain situations. I just wanted to recap my life for a minute, for no one's benefit but my own. I need to reflect and process and thank God.
Pro's of life:
I am in school for something I LOVE.
I am living with a beautiful and Godly family.
I have an awesome job at the coffee shop I frequented all of last year.
My church family and leaders are the abundant blessing of God in my life.
My professors (so far) seem to be incredible, and God in a very strategic and evident way shaped my next semester.
It's becoming Fall, my most awaited time of the year is here!
Sadness's of life:
I am poor. Ooooooh, how I am poor (in American standards, not the world's).
I am now in debt, which is lame.
I have no family by me. They are all 1000 miles away.
I desperately miss my family, I miss my home.
I miss my friends.
In a fury to bring tears to my eyes, my car died. And it costs lots of money to rebirth this clunky junky.
The other day I was praying and recognizing what a life lived with God is. These past Fall days I have whimpered and moaned at the testing of anxiety and patience in my life. It is difficult when one feels alone and without all needed resources to successfully make it through the day. It's hard; It feels like I'm trudging slowly through swamps and black mud that stains my shoes and attire. Yet somehow, through my tears, my heart greatly rejoices in what my hours are filled by! In the morning, I learn! I learn and I soak up knowledge of subjects and topics so dear to my heart. In the afternoon, I make and drink coffee. The times passes with giggles and giving people their espresso for the day. I then come home to a family who may not be my own, but cares deeply for my well-being and growth. Somehow God has changed the capacity of my emotions and the depths of my heart to hold both trials and tears, as well as the utter joy and enthusiam towards my current paths! This is life.
Childish as this may appear, here's how I'm processing my current situations:
If I could paint a picture of my life right now, I'd paint a dark and dreary storm. Grey skies would be unleashing treacherous winds and raindrops large enough to flood the ground my feet stood on. Trees would be knocked down, and maybe even some birds and cows being tossed into the night air (you know, Twister style...). I'd be standing in the middle of this painting with the evidence of the storm in my wet clothes and long windblown frizzy hair. Yet, my purple rain boots will dress my feet and protect them from the cold. A large Mary Poppins style umbrella will hang magically above my head to keep dry atleast the tops of my shoulders. ...And I'll hold an icecream cone tasting a bit of sweetness in the middle of this storm. I don't need an icecream shoppe to enjoy my treat, nor do I need to be weeping to follow suite with the rain.
I think this storm will continue to pour until it floods, and I'm sure an ark will become my new home among the waters. This is the season of life I'm in-learning to be content in all circumstances. Learning to embrace bits sunshine (or icecream) in the dreariest of days. However, one day-the dove will bring an olive branch and I'll find green life and land again. Thank You God for the life this rain will one day bring, thank You for the icecream and umbrella, and thank You for Your different seasons.
Okay, I went back into a metaphor which I said I wouldn't. Sorry 'bout that.
Over and out.
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